December 2008
24 posts
Well, Christmas has come and gone. I have to say I made out pretty well this year. The big gift was a real deal iPod. I now have 120 GB of pure playing pleasure. It’s so exciting I’ve employed alliteration in describing it. Actually, I’m pretty impressed with what these things can do now. I will probably just use it for music, but it can hold pictures and videos and...
15 Minutes I'll Never Get Back
I don’t know why I’m writing now, because it’s only 9:30 and I’ve got a good 7.5 hours left before I can leave, so I probably should pace myself on the time-killing thing. But, whatever.
I walked by this Lexus this morning with a license plate that said, “Love-40.” I thought this was just the tops. I mean, how divided a person must you be if you drive a...
Hamilton Made the NY Times! →
And this time it wasn’t for the Streaking Team. It’s because they don’t give a shit if there are fewer applications. They’ll just fake it, and let in more idiots! (Actually, they’ll probably end up letting in more people who deserve to be there, instead of all the prepped-out, cliche-spouting, LaCoste wearing assholes (and ass-women) who ran rampant through those...
Can I live vicariously thorugh someone else's kid? →
somepeopleshit:
And still if I’ve never even met him?
Wow, not only is this kid incredibly smart, but he gets to hang out with the people from Blades of Glory, 30 Rock/Forgetting Sarah Marshall and the dude who plays Obama on SNL on his birthday. Not to mention Glenn Kotche. What a lucky kid. If only we were his contemporaries and living in Chicago…we’d be more accomplished at age...
WatchSaw this on Attack of the Show last night. God bless G4 for creating the perfect Television Channel for the millenial slackers, potheads and videogame addicts (and those of us sympathetic to those groups or who are just fans of beautiful women).
Hey, I'm Kunu
“I know, we met yesterday, I’m Peter.”
“Oh, right, you’re that guy who works for Kaiser Permanente.”
“No, I’m Peter, we had a surfing lesson…”
“Oh, okay, cool.”
So, as you may realize, this is a posting about Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I was on my way to dinner the other night with my family and I drove by this small...
“You’re probably in work right now, ‘cause you’re like, an...”
– My friend, the one and only Tommy Gun.
blues101:
i got friended by melissa kong. I was like, ok, kind of random but ok. So i accepted. Then I saw this message and I was like God dammit, bamboozeled again. that crafty kong. so to answer dans question, yes, only friends of hers will be heard from, but she plans on friending the whole damn class. Also, I hate myself for using the word friend as a verb so often these days.
I’m with...
I am not qualified to write this blog
If I see one more headline about how Caroline Kennedy should not be allowed to be senator because she doesn’t have the necessary qualifications, I think I may just smash my 24 inch monitor with the tape holster thing I’ve got here.
Since when do people need to be qualified to run for political office? This is absurd. I don’t think I have actually been able to form an opinion...
this has gone too far
chimrichalds:
i got the exact same note from melissa kong several months ago. my response sounded super-lame.
If she gets in touch with me, I’m telling her three things: 1. It was pretty rough transitioning into life without college. I started doing some really hard drugs and drinking more than should be humanly possible. 2. I probably would have died from said drug/alcohol abuse were it...
“The President has issued an Executive Order excusing employees from duty on...”
– E-mail to all FTC employees! W’s the man, who gives a shit if he ruined our economy, destroyed our status in the world and sent thousands of young men and women off to die, he gave me the day off!
Good Piece →
Which one will I be, the chain-smoking alcoholic who has seen way, way too much of the war, or the guy who just hangs out with him and his girlfriend in NYC and writes about how fucked up that other dude is?
I’d chain-smoke the shit out of a war if it somehow resulted in my dating Lara Logan…
somepeopleshit:
Scott in a few years?
oof.
This week is Holiday Party Week at work. It’s like big-group, small-talk overload, and I am only moderately-versed in small-group, big-talk situations.
There you go, 5/14 of the words in that sentence were hyphenated. That’s five times better than my batting average freshman year of college!
The worst is when, on occasion, I actually start engaging in small-talk, then I realize...
My aunt just friended me on facebook, and then shortly after wrote this on my wall: “Scott! The FTC are my heros! You guys go after the spammers! I hope you don’t have to go crawl under a rock now.”
I don’t have to crawl under a rock, stop the use of social networking, maybe, but no rocks.
Also, I just found out the potential meaning behind Jay Farrar’s solo album...
I like The Muck
I just wanted to present some more insight from Chuck The Muck, because I think everyone will appreciate it. I was telling him about my job, and how they just switched me onto this shitstorm of a case. It’s apparently super busy, but the actual level of busy-ness is completely overstated by the other paralegal I am primarily working with at the moment. I think he thinks he is some sort of...
“On a final note, I know that the economy and job market are brutal right...”
– The brilliant advice of Melissa Kong (via somepeopleshit)
“Bitch, ain’t you ever heard you’re good as dead without a bank account? You ain’t changing shit with no change in yo’ pocket. Shiiiiiiitttttt.”—My buddy Charles (or as he likes to call himself,...
Don't you go and cut your hair
I’ve decided not to cut my hair for a while, but lately I’ve been using gel to keep it from looking unprofessional during work. I realized today, though, that I just look like coach Gordon Bombay (Emilio Estevez) in D2 when he starts emulating the Iceland coach, both in appearance and coaching style. He starts wearing a suit, slicks back his hair and starts yelling at the ducks and...
They just replaced my computer screen at work with a 24” monitor. I’m pretty sure it’s the same size as the TV I had in my living room growing up.
I feel like I’m sitting in the front row of the movies. I should have refused service.
If anyone ever asks you a rhetorical question like, “A screen can never be too big, can it?” you must answer, “Yeah, I...
“Thompson’s quote was part of an essay asking (rhetorically) if America was...”
– Someone on some message board talking about the Killers’s new single, “Human.” I suppose the best part is that this is the only intelligent post and is surrounded by idiotic comments about how that line just ‘doesn’t make any Goddamn sense’ and is...
The Charm of the Highway Strip
Around 8:00 last night, I pulled off the highway and onto the extension of Wisconsin Ave. in Bethesda, ready to take that into Georgetown and across the Francis Scott Key bridge to Arlington. I had just popped in the Magnetic Fields album with the same title as this blog post. The song with these lyrics came on:
“After all those days/on God-forsaken highways/the road don’t love...